Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Please ignore the flasher in pew 12.....

I think that with every suck my newborn took at my breast, out came a little pride. Its as if pride starts to slowly die with the birth of your little red, squirmy one. You slowly begin to realize that you would do anything for your child and that includes putting your needs/humility below theirs.

A good example is getting my family ready for an event. Lets take Easter for example. This year, Easter was crazy! I had two toddlers birthday parties within a couple weeks of Easter and I decided that the logical, sane thing to do was to host Easter dinner for 15. ( Can you say CCCCCRRRRRAAAAZZZZYYYYY??? )

I spent a week shopping for the perfect Easter outfits for the kids. I found the little one a beautiful dress that was classic, simple and of course on sale! I then found the big one a matching "spring green" dress shirt and sweater vest. They both matched each other, oh so casually. I then purchased a lovely spring green tie for my hubby. I was so excited thinking how good the pictures would look of my little family that I love so much.

Of course mama didn't buy anything new for herself. I was busy, which is totally fine with me. I knew I had a perfectly lovely dress from 3 Easters ago. I haven't been able to put my pregnant body in it since I seem to be a marathon reproducer with little time in between off spring.

I got in the dress no problem but had to ask hubby for a little help with the zipper. He had just as much trouble trying to get it closed. He sat there baffled, saying that there was plenty of room but it just seemed stuck. Finally we got the sucker zipped up and I congratulated myself for not only fitting in the dress but having some room to move/ breath. Woohoo! What do they say? Pride comes before the fall?

I got to church and was beaming looking at my crew. Clean and shiny in new shoes they looked like a picture. Hubby and I sat down to a lovely service and I couldn't help but think how blessed we were to arrive at church with no drama on Easter morning.

The service ended and I got up from my chair ready to go get my kids from their classes. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that a lady behind me gasped. CLUE #1!!!

As I threw my coffee cup away and started off towards the classroom I felt a little breeze. CLUE #2!!!

My mom flew up behind me, grabbed my arm and steered me into the bathroom. She then told me the horrible, awful truth.

My zipper had stripped the whole length of the dress leaving all of my backside exposed. Now ladies I am going to be real with you here...... I didn't choose my lacy romantic undies this day. I was in a hurry and wanted to be comfy. I had chosen this day, much to my chagrin, my "Aunt Flo is visiting", had since high school, stretched out, holy, need to throw away undies. My zipper, of course, ran all the way to my thighs. It had to be the most attended service in the whole year... filled to the brink. Good times.....

We tried to fix it in vain. It was a goner. I am not sure if the zipper was sewn poorly or it had stripped getting into it.

I should have been mortified. I should have wanted to crawl under the pew and never ever come out. I should have cried with embarrassment. What I felt however was a need to talk to my sons teacher and make sure that he minded and acted like the nice boy I know he can be. I wanted to see my little girl playing with the other kids and I wanted to get dinner started. I had too much to do to spend any more time in the bathroom!

I grabbed the back of my dress and made my rounds. I had all the naughty bits covered, got to talk to some of my friends (who probably thought I had a back injury but was too kind to ask) and got in the car. My hubby sheepishly looked over at me waiting for tears, screaming, something. I started laughing so hard that I almost added a wet yellow spot to my tragedy of an outfit. This was life. I was too busy, tired and filled with the joy of the day to give it much thought.

It was as I was changing that I realized that motherhood had transformed me. It had made me put two small creatures and their needs before my own. It had even made me care less about my flashing a hundred people and more about the lamb my son made in his classroom. How wonderful motherhood is!!

That being said, I always think twice about the undies I pick out before church. If round two would happen to hit I want to be prepared.


Amanda said...

For some reason, I'm laughing AND crying! What a great story to tell your children some day, hilarious! I'm so sorry this happened, but I too can see the beauty in it!